A year since I wrote something here. Just finished supporting a Level 2 ASHRAE energy audit for a really big hospital, the one where I was born. I didn’t expect how much enmeshed I have been in cooling and energy efficiency for the past three years since I was assigned the C4 project. Maybe Mr. Hicks was right, I’m quite passionate about this.
It has been 19 years since I first set foot in the AIM basement as an innocent fresh graduate during the transition from the CFC-11 phaseout to HCFC-123 in the early 2000s. Encountering the words ducting, compressors, chilled water, air handling units, fan coil units and of course refrigerants. I was just tasked to document the process into a procedure as part of the ISO 14001 management system but never did I foresee that one day, I can explain, support and justify the process to ASHRAE auditors on how the system works and how it can be further improved… even suggesting for district cooling as an ultimate solution…but don’t get your hopes high, they may only recommend unitary splits. Hydrocarbons?
Why did I get here? Was it fate or was it the deep rooted pain brought about by my distorted life of male dominance and misogyny. I never really talked about it, but maybe I still have not settled, cried and move on. I still can’t use the word “forgave”. It is still haunting me. It has been 19 years since the electrical pilferage incident, I felt it was the ultimate betrayal, may be its child abuse, electricity is no simple matter but you need to deal with it in the utmost integrity.
I have not forgiven anyone, because no one realized it was extremely painful and hurtful. I have hated myself in the process and immersed myself in learning how it works and why not knowing can make you extremely selfish and corrupt. And I hate the fact that I was born into it and I had no choice. I firmly believe I don’t belong where my personal life is settled. No one can choose your parents, your siblings and not loving yourself enough can lead you to choose the wrong people in your life.
Not knowing and not loving your building can lead you to choosing the wrong air conditioners and just waste up energy in the process. Its ironic how people condemning coal fire powered plants are not really looking at the demand side of how much people waste or even steal electricity just to waste it. I still have not moved, I may need counseling.