I guess I have come a long way in my career since I started out in lowly and menial jobs in the early 2000s (research assistantship when in fact it was just photocopying journal articles and binding documents for distribution). I was reading the material though and learned so much from this informal access to information and knowledge.
I did my best to invest in myself through training, education and accepting challenging work experiences that pushes me out of my comfort zone (i.e. Yamal LNG). I naturally have the courage and fortitude to go on an adventure to truly explore the world. I hope age does not stop me from doing it. The pandemic may have constrained these opportunities but I am certain things will fall into place.
I am now 41 and my kids are growing up fast, my eldest is now an adult. Strangely, I can already find time to do stuff that I thought were not possible after getting married and having kids. My relatives are now encouraging me to study abroad and finally pursue my academic temptation. I’ve realized that my family is out there ready to help in taking over in some of my responsibilities. At times, it is our mindsets that block the kindness and compassion from others.
Five years ago, I thought I was happy working on conformity assessment, but I was never satisfied. I didn’t expect that I would find an opportunity to work for international development and being recognized for it. However, I am still not fully settled and satisfied. I am now eyeing summer school short courses in the Netherlands and the United States by 2022 to prepare for potential doctorate studies which I once decided to forego after getting married in 2013. Now I’m determined even if my projects for the Germans are running until 2024. Time flies fast at midlife but I am thankful I still have the courage and the motivation to do it. I just believe that I am destined to do it.
I once thought that settling for something will be the source of my ultimate happiness but I was the kind of person that can allow myself to continuously accept challenges and always move out of my comfort zone. These are all external things that are all passing and fleeting. You just have to deal with it and not run away from it. That is the hard lesson I have learned in my life. Regardless of my career, my family status, my desires or whatever, these are all temporary. I hate that I am starting to get philosophical and spiritual in this blog, this is all about my work in the environment that I am totally enjoying it at the moment.